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Ever had written piece " woman 40 also be like a flower " , the mood at that time is the calm of what kind, of what kind cheesy. Actually in those days, oneself still are less than 40. Before you can say Jack Robinson, the birthday that has been about 39 years old, cross cavalcade of 40 years old, this makes return flatter oneself all the time I young, dare not accept a bit really. Accept it may not be a bad idea, be not accepted, time still takes flintily every day not of be puzzled year, I still am having so much bewilderment however.

Before two days, a person shops, lose wallet carelessly, the cost-of-living along with of a month can prove true oneself Id loses entirely use up light, what see advocate of newspaper broadcasting station only is full of favour of good person of not pocket the money one picks up, spread out however on the head that is less than me, does favour of this good person run did conduct propaganda go up? Look for not below the case of fruit, call to parental Shen Yuan, parents plaints: "Son, you are fast person of 40 years old, still do not take care euqally like 14 years old, how to call us to you can be at ease? You always should change change oneself. You always should change change oneself..

Parental sincere words and earnest wishes lets my feel deeply ashamed fell to ponder over much day quietly indeed.

Actually, all the time since, I try to change my, but effect is not big. It is that country changes confirm easily probably, the common saying that nature moves hard. No matter how I try hard, also cannot get the self-identity of everybody. In the eye of others, I am belonged to additional kind.

I how? I often examine my conscience: "Be me did incommensurate society or society abandon I? " perhaps, I ought not to come to this world originally, but this is not chosen by me. I came, have with this world too much antipathetic. Have the person that the friend says to I just should live in book, I do not understand a society too, of the life too not actual. My thought, I am too babyish to the view of the way of the world too pure, what I think the world is too good.

What I think the world is too good, be a kind of fault?

Person at the beginning of, quality this be apt to. Close of be used to, sexual photograph is far. The person is in this that is to say original, nature is kind-hearted. So kind-hearted nature authority is similar, just be in growing process, what because acquired element, surroundings is mixed,study an environment is different, it is good that moral also had with bad difference. Accordingly, the thing that can say to change our inherent quality is a society, be us live environment and life space. Probably most person as live of environmental life space change and changing oneself, and I am done not have. No matter days how transitional, how does the world fluctuate, I am standing fast only oneself fragile one party is domanial, the soul that holds the post of oneself windy thought freedom loafs about. I do not pay close attention to the each trying to cheat the other beside, treat each person beside sincerely, my former thinks sincerity changes sincerity, turn one's head looks now, what my sincerity changes finally is merciless harm.

Is sincerity also a kind of fault? I am not affirmatory. If say sincerity also is a kind of fault, I aux would rather make such fault. At least, I can make my conscience quiet.

When respecting conscience, regular meeting somebody distains to be considered. On this world a lot of more likely the person died out to live to be forgotten act against one's will this term, but I am writing down sincerely first and last however when the instruction that parents gives me: The favour of drop water should emerge fontal look newspaper, be an upright person must tell conscience.

Conscience why content? Conscience is his moral criterion actually, it is the expression of heart of a kind of feel no regret that do not have regret. I had made a lot of mistakes, self-conscious not self-conscious perhaps ground, but not be intentional absolutely. Each in the dead of night when the memory that I can search the past past, him call upon in the heart unbeknown secret, torturous can oneself conscience get quiet? If disturbed, I endeavor to make up for, endeavor to use the action that can make him conscience quiet to go condonable, I seem to always be in condonable in. I am not afraid of the weakness that exposes my, also not be afraid of the error that admits oneself. I open my mind hold the post of a person to read, be laughed at eventually however acid.

Is openness also a kind of fault?

In my eye, all life on the world are equal, it is the right that god bestows, I won't harm any intentionally to have the thing of life [link widoczny dla zalogowanych], although in that way life lives sometimes very low-down. But I live however the world of a the law of jungle, the life is the mensurable times of iron in a survival of the fittest, I am unalterable what, can bemoan the state of the universe and pity the fate of humankind, ju holds the tear of awake photograph cherish in both hands, to let a person feel I am argumentative.

Be my fault, be still others fault?

I am sensitive and exquisite amorous also, I love world, with kind-hearted heart is loving. The love that I hope to be able to use me exchanges the real situation of others [link widoczny dla zalogowanych], I think I am good-tempered magnanimous oneself, can include all error of others, never dispute accident. I know the tree does not have 9 fork, the person does not have perfect man. But my error never is excused by others however good-tempered, each mistake that I make resembles servile impress to be engraved on his forehead it seems that, waiting for the adjudgement of others.

How should I thoroughly |reform oneself to be an upright person afresh again?

I am content with the current situation, do not have the heart of wealth and position of scholarly honour and official rank, it is the capacity that I know myself [link widoczny dla zalogowanych], never dare break through bounds to pursue the thing that he cannot get [link widoczny dla zalogowanych], can let me feel very tired in that way, can let me break down. I am willing only is blessing in safety, it feel happy and living what to compare is important to feel happy and living what to compare. But all these became me again lazy laches does not consider the evidence with abandonment enterprising.

Common people! You can be in charge of me with wanting, let me follow one's inclinations vivid bout?

Gloomy sky is not had language, my heart is in my bosom, the beautiful that dies of old age like especially is put at this to let me view not clear world. Wind rises, a chill passes through the face of my wither , I am being examined with bemused eye all everything, too much bewilderment baffled I, not the age of be puzzled [link widoczny dla zalogowanych], bemused feeling, another lets me not the long night of Mian. . . . . .

.. This card is final by leisurely daughter heart at 2007-12-4 00:42 editors2 editors|||So you run this came. . . . . . |||What does the size of age seem to be done not have to be contacted necessarily with the age? Relevant Information：

UGG Classic Metallic Tall Boots Nickel 5866 5

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